If you find yourself feeling a bit on edge or low as the next working week gets closer, this one might be for you.
Understanding why you feel blue
There will have been (and continue to be) times in your working life where this tense, agitated feeling has been better, and times when it has been worse. This can be a good place to start when understanding yourself.
What is it about going back to work that is weighing on my mind? Is it an anxious feeling or a flat, heavy feeling (or even both?) What is it that makes me feel that way?
Is it a concern about what I am going to return to? How many emails? What crises might have arisen that I am going to have to deal with? Is it more about worrying that you might have missed something important before you signed off and there might be something waiting for you when you go back?
Is it more about disliking the job or the place you work? Is it about dread about how you will be spoken to or the overwhelming amount of stuff you will have to do?
Have you felt this way about all workplaces or all the time you have worked here? If not, why not? What was different?
Understanding what is bothering you is useful. Maybe it is something you can do something about or something you will get more confident or comfortable with as time goes by or maybe it’s something you can practice tolerating. Maybe it’s just an acknowledgement that it’s reasonable to be stressed, worried or concerned.
Maybe it’s a bit of a sign that perhaps this place just isn’t right for you. You might be able to do something about that now, or you might not, but it will be useful to know either way.
Choosing how to spend your time
I used to get quite a lot of this early in my career. What I noticed myself doing on a Sunday was feeling like I couldn’t really do much in the afternoon. I would find it hard to really be fully present with things because part of my mind was thinking about Monday coming. I just wanted to try to “relax” and turn my mind off, so I would want to sit and watch TV. It got to a point where I didn’t want to commit to things on a Sunday at all.
Unfortunately, that left me with lots of time to ruminate and think. It also meant that my weekends were almost halved. I only really had Saturday to enjoy.
When we feel anxious or tense, often we want to engage in things that distract us or take our minds off things. Sometimes the most effective things are the things that mean the least to us (trash TV, scrolling on our phones, etc). The reason we do them is because they sort of work. However, they are also pretty hollow.
The way out of this can be to practice trying to engage in and live your life fully, even though that tension is there. Saying yes to things on a Sunday night. Purposefully planning something social or enjoyable the evening before the return to work. It doesn’t make the tension go away, but you are likely to get a bit more from it than you would from pure distraction.
Something to think about
When we are dealing with how we feel, sometimes the success isn't about stopping ourselves from feeling something "negative" because sometimes that just isn't a reasonable aim. Sometimes the success is trying to do things that are helpful for us, despite the way we feel.
Something to do
Try out what it is like to do something meaningful on the afternoon or evening you are going back to work. Think of it as reclaiming that time as your own. Something work can't take away from you.
Thanks for reading! Until next week,
Ted
P.S. If you do try something or find something that works for you, let me know! I would love to hear it.
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